My name is Wizard, I’ve been in prison since 1993, and I am NEVER getting out. I made some bad choices early on, and I don’t get another chance. So hopefully you can make the necessary changes in your lives to prevent ending up like me! I don’t claim to have all the answers, wish I did. This is what happened, and what worked, for me.
Almost 4 years ago my Dad died in a car crash. That event almost broke me mentally and emotionally. I made the decision to mask my pain with drugs, instead of dealing with things head on. I ran from the problem, because I thought I couldn’t deal with the loss of my Father. I was determined to destroy myself as I had had enough. Not my finest hour. My doing drugs only affected me, right? Nope! What I couldn’t see was the effect I was having on my family and on my friends. I was so wrapped up in making myself suffer that I was blind to the fact that they were suffering right alongside me.
Straightening up to make my life better, didn’t have any appeal to me. So I had to find a reason to change. For me, that is my family. They are more important to me than anything. Had to face the fact that I wasn’t acting like they were. So, I started doing things for THEM, things I knew would make them proud or happy. Was it easy, no. In fact, it was the hardest time of my life. I had been using drugs and violence to escape the pain I was in. When I quit using that crap as a coping mechanism, all that pain, all that hurt was still there. I had to face it, not run from it. My family helped me thru that, continues to do so even now.
Change isn’t easy, true change takes A LOT of work. It takes being honest with yourself about what your problems really are, and being steadfast in your resolve to do whatever it takes to fix the areas in your lives that you need to fix. It won’t be a quick process, and at times it will seem like you’ll never be able to succeed. There will be days that you will feel like it just isn’t worth the effort. But over time, it will get easier, you will realize one day that things have gotten better. You might even come to like the guy looking back at you in the mirror. Whether you realize it or not, you do deserve to be happy, all of us here want you to be happy. When you start proving to yourself that you’re capable of change, you’ll find that other people will come out of nowhere, wanting to help you, eventually even ask for your help! Unlimited Potential, that is what all of you have.